Thursday, January 13, 2011


I have written before about how I consider myself a food addict. My behavior over Christmas break -- how easily I returned to binge eating and how oddly cathartic (yet disgusting) it felt -- seems to add credence to the mountain of evidence that I am a food addict.

While I usually feel in control over my behavior, sometimes I really don't. Sometimes it is as though I have no control over my decisions and I am just executing some primal, instinctual desire to eat that I have no control over. And for those of you who haven't experienced it? It is a mix of comforting, terrifying, and is without a doubt shameful to feel like you're a robot executing lines of code demanding that you eat everything within sight.

For this reason, I have looked into joining Overeaters Anonymous. Their #1 tenet is "We admitted that we were powerless over food and that our lives had become unmanageable."

Back in the day, I would have believed this. I absolutely felt powerless and hopeless about food. My life WAS unmanageable. Now that I've been in "recovery" for awhile, I no longer feel this way. I still make mistakes. I still have missteps. I'm by no means perfect.

But I am also not a victim. I do not feel powerless, or believe that I am. I am stronger than food.

However, I am aware that with the history that I have and the deeply-engrained (unhealthy) relationship with food that I have worked to change, that I cannot get too cocky and that I'm not above regaining all of the weight back. I want to form some sort of support structure to help support me when I slip and fall. I am not sure what this would look like. I had considered OA because this is what I thought they could help me to do. Since I disagree with their fundamental premise, however, I am not sure that I could join their group.

For you losers/maintainers out there, what are your thoughts and how do you find support? Has anyone tried OA?


  1. Sara, Interesting that you mention OA as I've thought about checking it out myself. There is a group that meets near my home at a convenient time and I like the fact that there is no cost and no specific eating plan. But sorry, I don't have any feedback or knowledge of anyone who has actually tried it. If you do get any feedback, be sure and talk about it. I'll check back to see if anyone leaves a comment.

  2. I don't know from experience but I do think that there must be some other support group rather than OA. I think it'd be a terrible idea to join when you don't agree with the fundamentals of the group. I think you've realized from other things in this journey that you have to find what works for you.

    I'm sure you already know about online support groups and etc for "healthy eating" or whatever you want to call it. I feel from the limited research I did on those a while back it sort of encompassed all eating disorders. If you haven't already, maybe that's a good start or you could find suggestions there for a support group.

    Remember at the least, your friends and followers are here for you and support you without judgement.

  3. I've never tried OA, but have thought about it. For now I'm sticking with Weight Watchers and making a big effort to get back on track after holiday eating has derailed me. I found a supportive group on the Weight Watchers site that has been very helpful for me.

  4. I know this is a really old post but I'm exploring your blog for the first time and want to chime in here, in case you start wondering about OA again. I disagreed with several of their premises and disliked the overall "culture" of OA but felt so desperate last year for answers that I gave it a go for several months. And yep, hated it. I ignored my discomfort at first but eventually decided I wasn't going to try to brainwash myself into liking and believing in something that the real me found creepy. Your experience, should you ever go, could be completely different than mine. But I think if you have red flags just from reading about them...well, those flags probably aren't going anywhere.


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